Author: Ryoga_Hibiki3 E-mail: ryoga_hibiki3@hotmail.com I ran out of creative juices, so this one kind of blows, but hey, I totalled in ten minutes. As you all know, I do not follow the original storyline and take matters into my own hands. Taco Bell is copyright and trademarked by JA Sutherland, the bitch, gotta love freedom of speech. Of course all Gundam stuff and other things are copyright of their rightful owners. Now that all the legal crap is outta the way, on with this ugly story. That'll Be the Day On the outside tables of some famous restaurant that you or I will never be able to afford, Treize Kushrinada sits having his daily brunch. He sits wearing his favorite blue sweater and slacks. He is overlooking the menu as a waiter walks up to him. Waiter: Pardon moi monsieur, have you made your decision? Treize: Yes, I'll have the usual. Waiter: If you knew you were going to have ze usual, why did you need the menu? Treize: I just wanted to remind myself where most of my money was going. Waiter: I assure you, it is all worth it. Treize: Go get my order in. Waiter: Oui, of course! The waiter mumbles something about pushy people before he leaves Treize's table. Treize raises an eyebrow at the comment he heard. Treize: Insult me will you... Treize picks up his straw from his water, rips off a piece of his napkin and starts chewing on it a little as he lifts the straw to his mouth. *shplort!* Smack in between the eyes! Waiter: Eck!! Treize: The Spitwad King strikes again... Treize reloads....*shplort!* Waiter: GAH! Treize: hee hee... At this point the waiter has walked over to Treize and plopped his plate in front of him. Waiter: That was not funny! Treize: That explains why everyone was laughing. It all comes together now... Waiter: Sir, I am afraid I will have to ask you to leave. Treize: Why is that!? Waiter: Because you are disturbing our guests! Other patrons: Go Treize, Go! Go Treize, Go! Waiter: .... Treize: Well, I've been told. Where's my mint? Waiter: You're what? Treize: My mint! You know, the free little 5 cent mint thingy! Waiter: Sir.. Treize: Don't sir me! Get your butt over to that counter and get me my free goddamn mint or else I will drag you out into the street, royally kick your sorry ass, steal your money and then sue you! Waiter: Oh, zat mint.. Treize: Yes, "zat" mint.. The waiter, with spitwads on his face still, rushes off and zips right back with a little mint for Treize. Waiter: Here is your mint sir, I hope you enjoyed your stay! Treize: Thank you. Waiter: No, thank you. Treize: *shplort!* Thank me again! Waiter: .... Treize: Bad waiter! No tip for you! With that, Treize hops over the bushes and walks out of the cafe without his mint leaving behind a very disgruntled waiter. Above the ground by about 500 miles, Milliardo Peacecraft is sitting first class on a flight waiting to land, he hopes, real soon. A flight attendant stops next to him. Attendant: Excuse you me sir, would, like, like a soda, some wine, peanuts, snacks, fly the plane?? Milliardo: No, I'm fine. Attendant: Would you like to join the mile high club then? Milliardo: ......................................................... .........No, that's alright. Attendant: Okay then! Milliardo: I guess you do get "everything" in first class.. Milliardo rested his head against the seat hoping that this last hour of the flight was over. It's just so boring being in an aircraft and not being able to blow things up.... Back on normal leveled out elevations, Duo Maxwell and our resident sexist pig Wufei are at the local gym, getting their weekend workout. Duo: Hey Wufei, I'm going over to the juice bar. Wufei: You were just there a few minutes ago Maxwell. Duo: It's a good way to meet women in good shape, am I right? Wufei: NO! You are wrong Maxwell!! Wufei drops the barbells he was using and stands up. Duo: Pfft, yeah right. Wufei: Listen to what I have to say you braided idiot! The women that you see here are nothing more than weak girls attempting to fool themselves into thinking they're strong! Duo: Uhh...Wufei... Wufei: Shut up and let me finish! They're deluding themselves Maxwell. These pitifull females cannot achieve what we men can. They will always be fragile women that need real men to watch over them!! Duo: I..uh...h-hey..... Wufei: How can you be so rude when someone is talking to you!? Duo: I don't know him....really... Wufei: Who are you talking to?? Duo smiles and inches away from Wufei. Wufei himself however turns around to see four manly women staring down at him with a rather angry facial expression. Wufei: .................injustice...? And with that sentiment, all four "weak" women start tearing into our heroic sexist Wufei. Duo is barely keeping an eye on Wufei as he is trying to talk up a young girl at the bar, which in turn fails and Duo ends up with a red handprint on his face. Duo sighs and walks back over to Wufei, who has been laying there for quite sometime. Wufei: Untie me... Duo: I didn't know your arms could turn that way.... Wufei: ......Maxwell.....hurry up.....and.....get my foot out of my pocket...so...I can...kick you... Duo: No thanks Wu-Man, I've been hit once already. Wufei: Maxwell!! Duo: Wu-Man!! Wufei: Maxwell!! Duo: Wu-Man!! Wufei: Maxwelll!!!!!! Duo: WU-MAN!!!! Wufei: MAXWELL!!!! About this time other members of the gym have gathered around the two idiots arguing. Man #1: That guy is yelling at that...pretzel thing... Women #2: Should your leg be able to be on the back of your head? Man #3: Do you think this is staged or something? Women #4: What's a wu-man?? Duo and Wufei sweatdrop. Duo scuttles away from the crowd toward the exit. Wufei: Shimatta.... Wufei, being curled into a ball of living flesh starts heading to the exit twinkling on his middle and index finger of his right hand. Back at the airport Relena, Heero, and Quatre await the landing of the plane that Zechs is on. Heero: Why do I have to wait for your stupid brother? Relena: I won't tell you where your Cocoa Puffs are if you dont. Heero, of course, whips out his gun and aims it Relena. Heero: Omae o korosu! Relena: Go ahead. Then you'll never find your cereal. Quatre: We shouldn't be fighting!! Heero & Relena: *Fwap* Quatre: oww.... Heero: I'll just wait till you show me where the puffs are. Relena: Then who'll buy your cereal after I'm gone? Heero: .....damn... Quatre: Hey guys, they just said that Zechs' flight will be delayed. Heero: Yay, more waiting.... Trowa is slowly pulling into the driveway of the Peacecraft Mansion with a package in his hand. (yes he's still doing the delivery service.) He takes off his helmet and tosses it on the bike walking inside of the house. As he is about to sit down, a car with a horrible sounding engine pulls up in the driveway. Duo enters hauling a very wrinkly looking Wufei. Duo: I hate that crappy SOPPORO!!!! Wufei: I'm sure it hates you too Maxwell. Duo: Ah, shut up. You're lucky those she-males didn't make you any worse than you already are. Wufei: Feh, I was just caught off guard was all. Duo: Yeah...did you know that I was once known as the tooth fairy? Wufei: Injustice! Duo: Yes, being with you is injustice. Wufei: You braided idiot! Duo: You sexist bastard! Trowa: Both of you shut up. I got a package with Wufei's name on it. Wufei: Is that a threat Barton?! Trowa: No, I really do have a package with your name on it. Wufei: ... Trowa hands the rather small package to Wufei. Wufei blinks as he takes it and starts taking the box apart. He takes out a little furry toy. Wufei: What the devil is this?! Duo: Heyyyy....that looks like one of those furby-gizmo thingies!! Trowa: I think it's the latest model. I'm not quite sure. Wufei: Who would dare send the great Wufei Chang an inferior toy such as this!? Duo: Shut up and turn it on already Wu-Man! Wufei grumbles to himself as he fumbles around the furbyish thing for the on switch. After finally finding it the furry toy opens its eyes evilly and looks around the room. Wufei: IT LIVES!?!!? Duo: uh... Trowa: That happens with all of them, I think. Furbything: Me Neelo, heheh! Wufei glares at the new toy he just received. Wufei: You are pathetic compared to me! Neelo: You are pathetic! Wufei: How dare a weakling like you call me pathetic!! Neelo: Pathetic weakling, heheh! Wufei: Such injustice from a machine! Neelo: hee hee hee. Wufei: I demand justice from an ingrate like you! Neelo: You weak ingrate, burp! Wufei: ARRGH!!!! Duo & Trowa: ... Meanwhile, Heero, Relena, Quatre and Milliardo are heading home in Heero's Lexus. Heero is in the driver's seat. Relena: So brother, how was your flight? Zechs: It was long, but I feel fine. Heero: That's too bad... Quatre: Heero! Heero: *thwap* Quatre: oww... Relena: I'm a tad hungry, what about you Milliardo? Milliardo: I wouldn't mind something as long as it isn't airline peanuts. Heero: Good.. Heero swerves the lovely car through a red light and into the parking lot of a Taco Bell, then throws the car into park and turns off the car. Relena: Heero, don't you ever do that again!!! Heero: .....puff... Relena: Don't you puff me! Milliardo & Quatre: *sigh* The quartet walk inside and walk up to the counter where upon stood a 5'10 young man with dark brown hair in the average Taco Bell uniform and the name tag "Oscar". Heero: Hmm..... Oscar: Just tell me when you're ready to order. Heero: Tell me...Oscar, what do YOU consider good food? Oscar: Jack-in-the-Box honestly. Quatre: He meant in this store.. Oscar: Oh, well, since there's four of you, I'd suggest a Grande Meal, with your choice of soft/crunchy tacos, and/or bean burrito's, as long as it adds to ten items. Milliardo: That's not very "Grande" sounding. Oscar: It's not very Grande tasting either... Heero: Then we'll have a Grande combo thingy with ten nacho cheese chalupas, minus lettuce and tomatoes, with extra three cheese, and easy on the nacho cheese. Oscar: Chalupa's do not come in the Grande Combo.. Heero promptly and silently whisps out his gun and aims it at the register boy. Heero: Omae o korosu. Oscar: ....You're pulling a gun at THIS Taco Bell? Heero: Yes, what do you plan to do about it? Give us our chalupas.... and four churros! Oscar: *sigh* Austin, we got a guy with a gun up front. Heero blinks as his gun is crushed by an awesomely giant white hand. The arm is attached to a 6'4 blonde young gorill....er, man with blue eyes and a drive thru headset on. Heero: ...shit... Austin: You WILL have 10 crunchy tacos, 4 nacho cheese chalupas and 4 churros, right? Quatre: Uhm..... Yeah, that's sounds like an order.. Relena: And four drinks..? Milliardo: ... Austin tosses the crumpled gun in the trash and does his infamous evil sadistic grin. Oscar: Okay, lemme ring up the order. Austin: ....I'm going back on drive thru. Heero hands the money to the young man named Oscar and hastily goes to a table with the other 3 to await their order. Past the lush gardens of the Peacecraft Mansion, towards the trees and past the driveway where Wufei is shifting the car into reverse and drive over and over on the blasted evil furby doll Neelo, Trowa is sitting with Duo on the floor in front of the television playing the Playstation. Duo: Oh dammit!!! Trowa: Oh yesh, Shor-Ryu-Reppa!! Duo: NO!!!! How the heck could you have gotten that giant red gem?! That's not right dude! Trowa: I think that you're just a sore loser on Puzzle Fighter.. Duo: Am not! That's the last time I use Dan.. But seriously man, you're as good as I am, and I play it more than you do! Trowa: That's because I plot where my pieces go, and build strategy and tactics so thatway I can counter your hits and throw my drop pattern at you when it hurts the most. That's all. Duo: Sheesh, you make it sound easy, I just go as the blocks fall. Trowa: Come on, let's go prep up Milliardo's room. Duo: Oh yeah, Relena asked us to do that, didn't she? Trowa: Yeah, she did. Just as the two leave the game console to go upstairs, the door slams open and lightning flashes as Wufei stands there with a demonic grin on his face. Wufei: I have vanquished the diabolic doll!!!!! MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!! Trowa: ....*thwack* Wufei: Oww...Injustice! Duo: ....*thwap* Wufei: Okay, okay, I get the point! Duo: Come on Wu-man, help us with Zech's room. Wufei: Fine....I feel refreshed now that the talking devil is disposed of. Duo: What do you mean I'm disposed of? Wufei: Not you, you moronic imbecile! The trio walks up the stairs towards one of the more larger rooms. But in the meantime the lexus pulls into the driveway and halts to a soothing stop as the doors open with Heero coming out. Heero: Looks like someone made a mess here. Relena: Oh my. Qutare: Hmm... Milliardo: Looks like some broken machine parts. Quatre: maybe duo broke his mini gundam figurine?? The other three shrug and start walking inside the mansion followed by Quatre holding their Taco Hell food. Back upstairs Trowa and Duo are setting up the final touches on the bed while Wufei is sitting on the floor next to the dresser and looks at the floor. Wufei: Hmm.....What is this... Wufei reaches out and pulls out a box. Yes, a box.....of...... COCOAPUFFS! Wufei: Sweet Mother of Mercy in a Victoria's Secret Catalog! Duo: Catalog? Where?! Trowa: What is it Chang? Wufei: It's a bo....nothing. Duo: A box of Victoria's Secret!?!? Trowa: A box of what? Wufei: Oh nothing that weak fools should know about... Duo: Give me babes in bras now! Wufei: No! It's my box of Cocoa Puffs!!!! Trowa & Duo: Oh, is that it?? Wufei: Yes, and theeey're MINE! Just as Wufei finishes the sentence there is a gust of wind through the room. All three of them look at the window. Trowa: Who opened the window. Wufei & Duo: Not me.. Hee hee hee.... Wufei: I know that laugh.... Duo: Eh? Trowa: Didn't you break that thing? Wufei snaps his head looking underneath the bed where Neelo was waddling out evilly. Neelo: Me Neelo. Me want puffs. Wufei: NEVER! I will die with this box in my hands of noble justice. No you evil spawn of SATAN! I crushed you! I broke you! And now, now I shall obliterate you!!!!!!!!!!!! With that Wufei leaped all two feet off the ground tackling Neelo and started biting and clawing at the despicable little machine of evil. Wufei: They are MINE!!! Wufei ripped the toy to pieces and was afterwards breathing heavily with a satisfied smile on his face. Duo: Dang... I guess the gym trips made you pretty tough after all. Wufei: It's all in the mind. The door opened and Trowa, Duo, and Wufei's heads instantly looked at the door as Heero walked in wearing his black bomber jacket along with Relena, Quatre, and Milliardo. Wufei slid the box behind his back. Relena: What was all that racket? Quatre: Yeah, we could hear it from downstairs. Milliardo: There's more of those broken parts... Heero: I smell Cocoa Puffs!! Heero attempts to whip out his gun, but remembers that it was crushed earlier. So, he slides a small pistol out from his jacket sleeve and aims it at Wufei. Heero: YOU HAVE THEM! Wufei: THEY'RE MINE! Neelo: Me Neelo... Wufei: ACK! It lives!! Neelo: Neelo want puff....yes....hee hee hee Heero swings the gun around and shoots Neelo with all 6 rounds of bullets shattering the toy to pieces. Heero: Silly toy, Cocoa Puffs are for Heero... As Heero puts the gun back into his sleeve the broken machine parts liquified and started to congregate together. Wufei: Injustice!! Heero: .....more shit... Relena: Oh dear.. Quatre: We shouldn't be fighting! Milliardo: ...*smack* Quatre: Oww.... Trowa: This could pose a problem... Duo: I love that movie!! Trowa: Actually T2 just came out on DVD. Duo: Really?! Wufei: Both of you shut up! Neelo: Hee hee hee, puff now, resistance is futile..... Wufei: Why doesn't it perish!?!!? Neelo started waddling toward Wufei saying puff every step of the way. Suddenly Treize jumped through the window wearing a black leather jacket, black shirt, black pants, and black shades and holding a shotgun. Treize: I'm back. Duo: You were never here.... Trowa: That's my jacket. Treize aimed the gun at Neelo and shot three rounds which made discs in it's stomach and left eye. Neelo waddled in plae to look at Treize as the left eye started to reform. Neelo: Me Neelo, hee hee hee... Treize: Not for long. Gimmie some sugar baby! Treize dives at Neelo and tackles the ebil (yes, he has obtained ebilship) Neelo. Neelo: Hee hee, you cannot destroy Neelo! Treize rips out the batteries from Neelo's body and holds them up like a trophy. Neelo: Oh noo..yyoo...uuu....bbb....aas....t..a......r......... Treize: Yeah, hail to the king baby. Duo: Isn't it hail to the chief? Trowa: Return my jacket. Duo: No, it's actually my jacket, Trowa's lying....yeah, that's it.... Trowa: *thwap* Duo: okok, it's his. Treize hands the jacket to Trowa and spits a wad at Milliardo *shplort*, then jumps out the window. Milliardo: ............... Relena: Wufei, take that toy thing of yours somewhere else. Wufei: Why should I listen to a fragile female such as yourself? Relena: because if you don't I'll have you glued to a chair at my slumber party and make you listen to Duo burp the theme song to Sailormoon and make you watch old She-Ra episodes, that's why! Wufei: How far is the dump from here again? Relena: That's better. Heero: Give me the puffs. Wufei: Never! Heero: Now! Wufei: Never! Heero: Now! Wufei: Never! Heero: NOW! Wufei: NEVER!! Just then Treize comes back in and takes the box from Wufei and jumps back out the window leaving a 5 dollar tip. Heero & Wufei: Omae o korosu Treize... Milliardo: Will all of you leave my room, it's been a tiring day.. The End Other junk.