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Tuxedo Kamen Name: Chiba Mamoru |
Heero Yuy Name: Heero Yuy |
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Tuxedo Kamen Name: Chiba Mamoru |
Heero Yuy Name: Heero Yuy |
Duo: Konnichiwa, minna-san! Welcome
to the "Ask Shinigami" show, with ME as your host, the Shinigami himself, Duo
Maxwell!
Relena: Duo, this isn't the "Ask Shinigami"
show, this is "Tuxedo DeathMatch..."
Duo: What? You gotta be kidding...*glances
at the show title* Damn...I guess this IS "Tuxedo DeathMatch!" I don't
do this crap!
Relena: Well...too bad, you are today...
Duo: *pouts* But Relena-san!
I don't want to!
Relena: *whips out her cell phone
and has her finger on the speed dial button labeled "Hilde"* You don't
want me to tell Hilde what you were doing at the prom when she was sick, do
you?
Duo: Eep! *mutters* Now
I understand why Wu-man hates all women!
Wufei: INJUSTICE! My name is *Wufei!*
NOT "Wu-man"!
Duo: I know, I know...Sheesh!
Can't anyone take a joke? Anyways, today's contestants to this REALLY
POINTLESS CRAP *glares at Wingnut* are Tuxedo Loser and my best friend in the
whole world--
Relena: Not to mention, my boyfriend...
Wingnut: *whips out her Gauss cannon*
Whose boyfriend?
Relena: Your OTHER boyfriend....
Wingnut: *grins*
Duo: Ladies! Can I PLEASE finish
my speech?
Ladies: Humph!
Duo: As I was saying before Wing
and Relena started to fight over whose boyfriend the other contestant happens
to be, the guy Tuxedo Faggot happens to be losing to is...the Perfect Soldier
himself, Heero Yuy!
Wingnut: Woooooo! Go, Heero-chan!
Relena: Hai, ganbatte, Heero-chan!
Heero: ...I thought I told you two
NOT to call me THAT...
Ladies: *bow heads* Gomen...
Duo: ...That was disturbing...Well,
it would appear that the fight's begun! Heero doesn't waste any time,
and immediately begins beating the shit out of Tux! Damn...I never knew
how savage Heero-kun could be...
Relena: I did...*smirk*
Wing: What do you mean, "you did?"
Relena: My secret...*grins*
Wing: Hirogeru onna! Shinide!
*starts beating the crap out of Relena*
Duo: *looking behind him and watching
the catfight* Ladies, ladies...LADIES! Stop that! You
know Heero wouldn't want you two lovely ladies fighting over him!
Ladies: You're right...*make up and
sit back down* Go HEERO!
Duo: Oi...I'm starting to get a headache!
Tux, who is in dire need of medical attention, decides that the only way to
get Heero off of him is to do a La Smoking Bomber! He launches the attack,
which leaves Heero-kun completely confused...
Wing: NO!
Relena: The smoke clears up, and...Heero
is nowhere to be found! Oh no! What has he done to my--*sees the
Gauss Cannon again* I mean, OUR Heero-chan!?
External Speakers: Damnit, Relena!
I told you to STOP calling me THAT!
Wing: What the...OH MY GOD!
The Wing Zero Gundam has suddenly appeared out of nowhere! Uh-oh, 'twould
appear that Wing Zero's beam cannon is beginning to power up...and...
Relena: I can't watch! *turns
around*
Duo: *grinning like he's possessed*
Heero fires the beam cannon, and Tux is instantly vaporized! YES!
Now we don't have to put up with Tux anymore! Wooooohooooooo!
Wing: *dances around like an idiot
because she's happy that she put TuxFag to death again*
Relena: *runs outside as Heero gets
out of Wing Zero and gives our favorite Gundam pilot a kiss*
Wing: *stop dancing and looks outside*
HEY! DAMN YOU!
Duo: *holding Wing back* You
know, Miss Wingnut...you always have ME, Shinigami *winks*
Wing: I'm going to be sick...
Duo: DAMN! At least I tried!
Tune in next time, when Tuxedo Faggot goes against another anime character and
gets his ass horriblhy beaten! And remember to tune into 66.66 FM WDUO
for MY show, "Ask Shinigami!" Until then, loyal Duo lovers and Tux Haters...Ja
ne!
